Keep on Smiling

Written October 22^nd

Despite our current struggles and recent sorrow, we continue to smile daily. There are so many things to be grateful for, especially our family, it's hard to be sullen for any length of time. Jogging several times a week has become a family ritual. Damon decided a couple weeks ago that he would rather jog with me than ride his bike, and he's been running with us ever since. I've been impressed with his endurance. Adam runs about a ten minute mile when he's not pushing himself and Damon can keep up pretty well; however, Adam goes just fast enough that Damon has no time to dawdle. If he does, he has to push himself pretty hard to catch up. With me, Damon can easily keep up. Usually he runs up ahead of me, dawdles until I catch up with him, then runs ahead again. But, a lot of times he'll just stay with me and we talk and hold hands as we go. It is such a joy to have him interested in spending time with me, although his energy is a constant reminder of what I lack. Yesterday, while we were out, he pulled back behind me for a second. When he came up beside me he said, "Mommy, when I was looking at you from behind, you looked like you were going too-too-too-too slow." I could only laugh, agree with him and say, "You're probably right, but at least I'm still jogging, right?" To which he promptly agreed. Then, not two minutes later, he pulled into the lead and called back to me, "Mommy, keep up with me, 'kay?" I honestly tried, but knew I wouldn't make it as far as I wanted to go at that speed. So, I told him sorry, but I needed to go at my own pace. Of course he asked "why?" to which I explained that I was carrying 5 Damon's and he only had to carry one, so I just couldn't go as fast as him. Although rather shocked, he understood what I was explaining and the discussion about our difference in size ended. I wish I could say I was exaggerating for the benefit of my point, but I wasn't and now I hope I don't regret sharing that disturbing detail about myself.

We were half-way done when the rain began and by the time we were done with the running portion of our outing (at out half-way point), it was pouring. Damon artfully pointed out how much the rain was making him sweat and I just had to laugh cause he was just full of interesting comments that morning. He also told me that he loved me so-so-so-so much which made him think about what Adam had told him. Damon informed that "Daddy says when you say things lots of times, it makes people's brains turn off." Of course I laughed at that too and told him that that had some truth to it, but I was always glad to hear him say, "I love you." We waited under a bridge until Adam and Ashton met up with us. Then I waited with the kids while Adam jumped the RV park fence and brought the car to pick us up. Everyday there are so many things to smile about and be grateful. I am continually striving to let them outshine the challenges life sends our way.

Ashton is learning and growing so quickly. He's beginning to repeat words after us, and he's even understanding what they mean. Last week, we decided it was time to expect him to ask nicely for the things he needed or wanted. I honestly was just tired of him screaming whenever he wanted something. So, after only a couple days of stubbornly expecting him to say please before his request was granted, he caught on. Now he says please all the time. The other morning he woke up early, and out of the dark I could hear him saying, "-ease, baba. –e-e-e-ase, BABA! –E-E-E-E-ASE-BABA!" I couldn't refuse it, but now he says please whenever he wants anything and half the time I don't know what he's asking please about. I hope he doesn't give up one of the times cause his poor mother wasn't blessed with ESP. It's so much fun, though, to be a part of his learning and growing process. Everyday he surprises up with something new from learning to tease to saying a new word. In our sometimes mundane and cramped existence in this trailer, the sure do well to liven things up and I am so grateful to have them in our lives.

Yes, we are very-very-very-very blessed.